The Crossroads

I’m sitting in the darkness at 12:50 am MST. I should be in bed and asleep because I don’t do well on only 5 and a half hours of sleep. But instead I’m deciding to sit here on my computer and write about my life and the position I’m in.

I imagine myself walking a long a path, a path I chose long ago and thought that it would bring me to where I needed to go. Up ahead, I notice that I am soon to be confronted with a crossing path that would take me elsewhere. I know that up until this point the path I have been taking has let me down and I have lost the enthusiasm for it. I am weary of it and I need something more. It is a matter of self interest and self preservation that I must make this decision and not ignore it.

I have three choices: to continue along the path and ignore the crossing path, to turn left, or to turn right. The left path leads me to a warmer climate but uncertainty in both education and vocation. The right path leads me to a new vocation but the same, cold climate that’s far away from familiar faces. I forgot to say that I have a companion that travels with me. She would prefer the left path–where she can live close to friends and family. If I travel that path, my vocation and education will be, as I said, shrouded in uncertainty and I will have to start over from the beginning. If I choose the right path, at least I will have some sort of base in which to start something new. My vocation will be certain as well.

So I sit and wait, on these the crossroads of my life, pondering my choices. I am being pulled in different directions by different forces and I haven’t the strength to give way to any of them. But until I know what I must do, it is my destiny to sit in the middle of the Crossroads and wait and wait.